Finding Life in the Limits
On Constraint, Creativity and Cherishing the Only Life You Have
“There is no event so commonplace but that God is present within it, always hiddenly, always leaving you room to recognize him or not to recognize him, but all the more fascinatingly because of that, all the more compellingly and hauntingly.” - Frederick Buechner, Now & Then: A Memoir of Vocation
There is not a single human able to escape the constraint of reality. Perhaps it’s simply an unspoken acceptance among adults or a truth etched into the fabric of time itself, but either way, many live with an underlying fear that somewhere along the way they missed the train of promise and now they're forever stuck at the station. Whether it be financial shortfalls, relational disrepair, career disappointment or diminishing skill sets, all must deal with life’s limitations.
While these sentiments can initially be a source of sadness, limitations serve the long run. For example, consider the constraint of living in a community. There is a reason that in an age of constant digital connection, loneliness and depression have skyrocketed. A lack of limitation has actually come to define the paradox of the age: there are more ways to contact one another than ever before, yet we find ourselves in a deficit of dependance. Or, perhaps better said: the possibility for connection does not automatically equal the existence of community.
In his profound book on the state of our republic, Professor Patrick J. Deneen beautifully captures this sentiment, writing, “Properly conceived, community is the appropriate setting for flourishing human life—flourishing that requires culture, discipline, constraint, and forms.” His point is that flourishing occurs within the confines of a community of people in actual time and space. Thus, constraint and commitment are the necessary prerequisites for connection.
With this in-mind, a single truth arises: life is found within limits. Again, it may seem counterintuitive, but hear me out. Just imagine for a moment if you released visions of yonder and the pursuit of a life of unfettered freedom. When life is met on its own terms, something miraculously and unexpectedly rises to the surface. Treasure is found in the trash. Love is found in the midst of lawless lands. Constraint gives forth to a greater cherishing of what is currently had.
“The first demand any work of art makes upon is surrender. Look. Listen. Recieve. Get yourself out of the way.” - C.S. Lewis, An Experiment in Criticism
“What you do in the present—by painting, preaching, singing, sewing, praying, teaching, building hospitals, digging wells, campaigning for justice, writing poems, caring for the needy, loving your neighbor as yourself—will last into God’s future. These activities are not simply ways of making the present life a little less beastly, a little more bearable, until the day when we leave it behind altogether. They are a part of what we may call building for God’s kingdom.”
- N.T. Wright, Surprised by Hope
One of the great gifts in constraint is creativity. As the artist Makoto Fujimura describes, “All artists seek the New [Creation]; great ones redefine what Newness is. An artist hovers in between what is conventional and what invokes the future.” Creative expression comes in all sorts of forms—whether through painting, pottery, or poetry—yet all serve the same purpose: re-enchanting the ordinary and breathing fresh fervor into the seemingly dull and demanding.
To create is not only a means of coping but also a part of God's calling. As Fujimura continues, “Unless we become makers in the image of the Maker, we labor in vain. Whether we are plumbers, garbage collectors, taxi drivers, or CEOs, we are called by the Great Artist to co-create. The Artist calls us little-‘a’ artists to co-create, to share in the “heavenly breaking in” to the broken earth.” All are called to collaborate with God in seeing the glories of heaven on earth.
While you may not be artistic in the narrow sense, all can view their daily actions as a matter of a craft. When you adopt the mindset of an artist to all the ordinary rounds of life, fully recognizing that you have something significant to offer the world, all becomes a part of a legacy of spiritual significance. In the end, nothing is wasted on the cutting room floor of God’s created order.
All that remains is to courageously step through the threshold of constraint. In the face of doubt and despair, there is one final reminder you can’t forget: Christ first lived a life of constraint. In moments of angst, gospel your own heart, reminding yourself that another has gone through every challenge you encounter yet emerged stronger. Only in the embrace of constraint can creativity come, with the cross serving as the inevitable path to God’s new creation.
Practice - Plan a visit to your local art museum. Invite a friend or make it a date night. If a piece stands out to you, pause for a good while. Let it personally speak to you and inspire your own creative contribution. For all my PNW peeps, check out the Seattle Art Museum’s new exhibit on the life and work of Hokusai.
Prayer - Lord, help me see life’s limits not as a form of punishment but the place where your numerous promises find fulfillment. When my heart and mind grow weary, fill me with a fresh fervor to remain steadfast. Remind me that the long night of Good Friday ultimately gave way to the rising sun of Easter morn.
A Few Recommendations
With the season finishing, my capacity for the many pleasures of pop-culture has began to slowly increase. Here are a few things that I’ve enjoyed in-recent:
Loki (Season 2) - Like many, I’ve grown a tad tired of the overabundance of superhero content. Nonetheless, Loki has delivered in its 2nd season (and I absolutely LOVED the first season). Make sure to check it out on Disney+.
Do Hard Things: Why We Get Resilience Wrong and the Surprising Science of Real Toughness - Through a balance of science and story, performance coach Steve Magness offers an alternative to stereotypes on toughness that have pervaded our culture. I found this book so helpful as a parent & coach.
Upcoming - In this month comes Season 3 of Slow Horses (Apple TV+), Season 2 of Reacher (Amazon Prime), Sam Esmail’s adaptation of the best-selling book Leave the World Behind (Netflix), and the much anticipated streamer starring Nathan Fielder and Emma Stone: The Curse (Showtime).
Newport Coaching Update
I have officially completed my first season as a high school football coach! To say I had fun is the understatement of the century. I had an absolute blast grinding it out everyday with a close-knit group of players and coaches.
We ended the season with a 4-6 record, and had numerous close games that we believe will go our way next season. Two of my receivers finished in the top six in the league for receiving, and both earned all-conference honors. Additionally, we also shattered numerous school records for passing that stood for decades.
If any of my coaching friends have recommendations on the best ways to grow in the offseason, please send them my way. I'm eager to learn more during this offseason so that I can become a better mentor and coach to many. And of course, I'm already looking forward to returning to the sideline next fall!
An inspiring reflection. Wonderful quotations.